suburban girl making noise: Archive

Apr 22nd

1,473 notes

1 tag

“He was one of the first people in Britain to own a Tamagotchi.”

– about Sean Moore. Easily the best fact in Everything. (via live-at-dominoes)

Apr 20th

53 notes

1 tag

Apr 20th

205 notes

Apr 18th

2,313 notes

2 tags

Apr 18th

1,446 notes

1 tag

Apr 14th

8,609 notes

3 tags

Apr 13th

3,206 notes

1 tag

Apr 13th

387 notes

A dramatic Shakespearean response to every...

When something bad happens: True is it that we have seen better days.
When something REALLY bad happens: O woe! O woeful, woeful, woeful day! Most lamentable day. Most woeful day That ever, ever I did yet behold! O day, O day, O day! O hateful day! Never was seen so black a day as this.O woeful day! O woeful day!
When people say that something is wrong because the Bible says so: The Devil can cite scripture for his purpose.
When my girlfriend abandons me for food: FRAILTY, THY NAME IS WOMAN!
When someone doesn't thank me for holding the door open for them: BLOW, BLOW, BLOW, THOU WINTER WIND! THOU ART NOT SO UNKIND AS MAN'S INGRATITUDE!
When I burn something while cooking: MY CAKE IS DOUGH! 
When human stupidity frustrates me: LORD, WHAT FOOLS THESE MORTALS BE! 
When someone says I'm going to hell for my sins: NYMPH, IN THY ORISONS BE ALL MY SINS REMEMBER'D. 
When I'm broke: My pride fell with my fortunes
When someone turns the light on after a period of darkness and blinding light ensues: OH, SHE DOTH TEACH THE TORCHES TO BURN BRIGHT! 
When someone disagrees with me: THERE ARE MORE THINGS IN HEAVEN AND EARTH, HORATIO, THEN ARE DREAMT OF IN YOUR PHILOSOPHY. 
When I argue with my girlfriend: The course of true love never did run smooth. 
When I'm embarrassed: MUST I HOLD A CANDLE TO MY SHAMES?! 
Someone says "Good Night": Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow.